Psychomuse.com
Psychomuse.com
Poetry, 2006
CLOUD NINE
42006012311 - ©2006 WLL
I went to work today.
Abnormal shift, I know.
Precious moments, all we had
Before I had to go.
But off and on throughout the day
I felt my thoughts return to you.
There are no windows in my office
But through the walls, the sky was blue.
I left the place at 4pm,
Drove myself to get some crix.
For Lance and Guin were surely hungry
And soon would want their cricket fix.
At the shop, familiar truck
But so caught up in thoughts was I
That as I waited for the crix
Someone caught me by surprise.
I dated him before we met
But it wasn't strained between us yet.
So I said "Hi" and heard his tales
Which all took place since we had failed.
He's married now with lots of pets;
Doing well, his mom, his truck.
Had an accident but otherwise
Sounded like he found some luck.
I showed him Dante, said I'd moved,
I tried to tell him all 'bout you.
But word gets 'round this little place.
My happy heart is known these days.
We idled in our conversation
Then we went our separate ways.
As I left I felt so weird
But glad for all these happy days.
I had prayed he'd find Ms. Right
And then I ran into them tonight!
I once had wished the same for me
And now I'm right where I should be!
If only everyone could be this happy
Maybe hate would all decline.
For if the planet was this fortunate
Like me, they'd be upon Cloud Nine!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
SONGBIRD
42006020241 - ©2006 WLL
The shadowy figure of elocution steps in
Before, but a thought, now on the horizon
He lurks in the alleys among city streets
And hides in the plains of the old, roaming bison
A tree alone upon this plain
She never understood her grace
Always waiting for an angel
To deroot her from this place
The time had come that in her roots
Could be found the water needed
To make her grow and stand up tall
The thought of which, she'd never heeded
And came to pass a day at last
When on her branch a bird alighted
Into the night the pair had chatted
None before him so delighted
The tree, she marvelled, for a time
As the bird kept nestled there
Two hearts of gold, so pure and true
For they both knew they were a pair
It's said that somewhere in a town
There stands a healthy, stronger tree
A happy songbird in her branches
Wait a sec. The tree is me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
BROKEN HOME
42006020611 - ©2006 WLL
I don't care if the rumours are true
I don't care if they're not
I just want us all to get along once again
I'm getting so tired of this repeating plot
Stop all the bickering
Stop the fighting, oh please
Whatever happened to love at first sight
Our family's riddled with an awful disease
Sometimes I want out but I'm always afraid
That whatever I do won't be enough
I'm riddled with guilt I never deserved
I try to remember - I've gotta be tough
But at night when I pray at the side of my bed
I pray and I hope there's really a God
And that He will see what we're all going through
And comfort us all with His staff and His rod
So far all I've got is heartache and pain
And when the tears are no longer falling
I wake up, so cold, upon the dirt floor
And still I can hear the awful name-calling
But I don't care if the rumours are true
And I don't care if they're not
Why can't we all get along once again?
Why are we fighting? I don't know. I forgot.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I LOVE YOU
42006021641 - ©2006 WLL
What is the splash of darkness in there
Hiding within a heart I know cares
Things from our past can always take their toll
But I want you to know that I love your soul
And I love you
If you wake up in the middle of the night
And your hand can't find its way to the light
Just reach for me and I'll hold you so tight
Until morning comes to give back your sight
For I love you
And if you begin to question yourself
Don't hide your heart upon a high shelf
I'll cradle it gently within loving arms
And I'll do my best to prevent it from harm
Because I love you
You know my feelings but please understand
That you hold my heart in the palm of your hand
I've never felt the way I feel now
There was a time I didn't know how
But I love you
And with you by my side we hike the same trail
When we try to jump I know we won't fail
And every sun rise casts a warm yellow hue
Into this room because I love you
I love you
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
CELEBRATIONS
42006030721 - ©2006 WLL
I woke up in the early light this morning
Things were on my mind
As usual, you're at the forefront of them all
I found myself so tired
Ruminating over past events
And those of all my future dents
In the world, I fell asleep
Upon the couch, so deep
And in my dreams I saw you there
As Kitty cuddled in my hair
I took my time in waking
For all the dreams that I was making
Scared me into thinking they
Would never come to me some day
And as I watched myself outside
On the porch where I'd once hide
I felt the grass between my toes
Where only God could ever know
That late one evening, into day
I'd finally want to move away
My heart, it ached, for past sunshine
I longed for days when I would dine
Alone with books and things unspoken
Before the days when I was broken
The grass and breezes slipped away
As my eyes opened on today
I found I had no memories here
Of the spring I had last year
And all I've got so far is fall
I lived alone and had it all
And now I wake up in the morning
You are by my side and yawning
The sun still shines into my room
Where my spirit still could loom
And as I see my soft reflection
I can not see the old dejection
I've left behind my former days
But in their place are brighter rays
And soon I know the sun will cast
Its light upon this porch at last
My feet will settle on the ground
Dragonflies will soon abound
Instead of metal I will play
With ponds and rivers every day
Warmth and love, they've come to stay
I cry for what I've lost
And celebrate all that I've gained
Because you've come my way
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
THANKSGIVINGS
42006061911 - ©2006 WLL
Look at my smile and tell me You're glad
I've talked to You my whole life, even when I've been so sad
Not all of my prayers were answered right away
But all of my dreams, they came true anyway
I thank You for the inspiration, I thank You for the soul
You give me so much each and every day as I grow old
I thank You for the strength that keeps me going on
In the face of raw adversity when everybody else would be long gone
I know I've done a lot with me
I know my choices help to make me who I am
But without this spirit that You gave me, I'd be nothing more
Than a body; Your love's within my very core
My truth is in my eyes, don't disregard it so easily
Making myself happy has become my sole priority
'Cause I'm the only person who will ever be
With me my whole life, yep, me, and only me
Who else in this world will care for me
The way I only can?
How could I ever love another
If I couldn't love the person that I am?
I couldn't, that's what I've found
With all the patience I could muster, truth abounds
I love with all my heart, now that I know my heart is there
And somewhere in my life I found that I can care
So deep in love am I, with myself and You and Dale
And now I know for sure that I could never fail
You, sure I still forget at times and then I am afraid
But all I have to do is see the love You made
And I'm all right, in the night, when I look out at the sky
At the stars, and at Mars, the warring part of my life
Every now and then I look into his face and see
The other half of me
I know I've done a lot with me
I know my choices help to make me who I am
But without this spirit that You gave me, I'd be nothing more
Than a body; Your love's within my very core
My truth is in my eyes, don't disregard it so easily
Making myself happy has become my sole priority
'Cause I'm the only person who will ever be
With me my whole life, yep, me, and only me
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
EMPTY MIRRORS
42006071121 - ©2006 WLL
Smudgy glass that separates
The outside world from your very own
Looking through the rosy colours
Can't believe the way you've grown
At times your world is still a blur
At times your life seems to concur
With all your dreams and still you are
Lost within your eyes afar
What does it take to please your mind?
What braille will cease your being blind?
Can any music reach your soul?
Can any Saviour make you whole?
You hear my voice, you recognize
The truth that speaks within my eyes
But every time, you have to gasp
Even though you're in my grasp
Fear me not, O child of my heart
I want you to know we're never apart
I hold you softly in the breeze
You've nought to fear within these trees
I stroke your hair and hold you tight
I'll be with you when you say goodnight
I love you like you were my own
I won't treat you like a drone
Smudgy mirrors, I can see you
Can you see me in the glass?
I'm looking deep, will you forsake
The one who found you long at last?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
MR. ANAL
42006072421 - ©2006 WLL
They say people hate
What they know deep inside
Is a part of who they are
Yeah, you know people lie
There is this guy I know
Mr. Anal is his name
He struggles to be right
Perfection is his game
But when the music comes
The words just pass him by
I told him I could help
I tell him I can try
His ears are closed to all my words
He doesn't hear the things I say
If only he would tell me why
He won't invite me in to play
For years I struggled
Music beat against the bars
Trying hard to be let out
But it's from Venus, I'm from Mars
So I've written words without a soul
Without the wings to bear them home
I hated Rap for many years
'twould never be what I condone
I guess it's true what people say
'Cause rap is all I'll ever be
But I declare, without the sound
My words will never find they're free
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The following six "poems" are
actually "lyrics." They are my
attempts to mimick styles of six
songs. A musical coworker had
challenged me with this project
as a sort of test to see if I may
be capable of writing lyrics for
him. I probably failed miserably,
but considering what I had to work
with, I don't think I did half bad.
I'll find out later today.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lyric 01: INK BLOT
42006072521 - ©2006 WLL
My writing - it's like a highrise rising
I'm an architect
Building and conceiving
My writing - you don't have to like it
But move aside roadkill
I'm my own stamp of approval
I don't care
No I don't care if you want prose
Keep your nose up in the air
You don't care
You can't see the simple truth
'Cause it's hidden in the drummer's snare
Hold up your ink blot
In front of all the multitudes
To decipher what they're worth
Hold up your ink blot
Tell the millions what they think
And how you know they're wrong
Einstein was considered stupid
No one believed his genius
He tried to help, we wouldn't listen
You think that I'm a moron
You won't believe the words I say
When I say what's not hearsay
Scuttlebutts, hang them on the clothesline
Don't give me your elucidation
I can talk you off the stage
Hold up your ink blot
In front of all the multitudes
To decipher what they're worth
Hold up your ink blot
Tell the millions what they think
And how you know they're wrong
Hold up your ink blot
Tell yourself that you are stable
Even as your mirror cracks
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lyric 02: MANIC FUROR
42006072522 - ©2006 WLL
Too young these words cannot be born
They sting
A thousand itchy papercuts
As they start to germinate
Just take the gloomy words I saw
Flash your silver tongue at me
Correct my failures at concordance
Don't shut me down another day
Tell me why you're so refined
And what you think is of importance
Some thoughts are like a thousand laughs
Heaving, heavy in your chest
They gnaw the air you need to breathe
Vacuums full of teeth
Fingers bleed silver in desperation
Liquid poison mercury
Seeping into unforgiving keys
Killing capacitations
Screaming manic furor
My mind is hemorrhaging
Operate on me
Leave me hanging on this tree
Just let me be
Searing off my flesh in vain
All my words they fall like rain
Drops of oil lend some grease
This hot metal under me gives lease
Sign right here on the dotted line
Fishing here will earn a fine
Earn your keep
Leave me dying on this tree
Kick me curse me let me be
All my words they fall like rain
Drop some acid in my vein
Pegmatite is hard to break
These prison walls you make
My cookies crumble in the net
My wages spent and I forget
The plot you seek
If it's a lie you want
Go downtown to the corner store
The girls all know you
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lyric 03: FROST YER ASS
42006072631 - ©2006 WLL
Aight gather round don't sit too near
We gonna sit and drink some beer
Bring on the whiskey keg and gin
Lessee what kinda state we're in
When the morning paper comes
Talkin' shit 'bout homeless bums
We'll frost their keisters in the snow
Set their assets all aglow
Give us drugs and give us more
Let us be what we abhor
It won't matter anyway
When the night turns into day
They'll surround us all with guns
Don't understand our having fun
But we'll frost their keisters in the snow
Set their assets all aglow
Assets, assets, give us all
All your assets
Set them down upon the ground
Watch the lightning all around
Zaps your ass, your hair turns white
Who could imagine it would happen overnight
Cheers to Casper as he floats
In the pastures with the goats
We'll frost the keister of the ghost
Ectoplasm served burnt toast
Give me yours I'll give you mine
We can whip 'em all the time
White potatoes mashed to cream
Will we wake up
Or keep on dreaming, no
One night we'll wake up to the sound
Of how the Taters do abound
Cook them mash them zap them eat
We're elite
Assets, assets, give us all
All your assets
Diamond in the rough
Sparkling in the bedrock
When it becomes polished
We leave our assets behind
Assets, assets, give us all your
Can't take 'em with us
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lyric 04: BLOWFISH
42006072632 - ©2006 WLL
So you think you know me but you don’t
You say you’ll help but then you won’t
Nowhere to go and I’m losing my mind
I’m gonna blow up atcha
I’m gonna blow up atcha
I’m gonna blow up atcha
You don’t know why I’m angry
You don’t know why I hate
You’re useless in my storm
Don’t want your scorn
I’ll kick your ass out with a smile on my lips
You think you’re all that but you can’t please this bitch
So you got it all but you’re only screaming
Take your lines and a
Take your lines and a
Take your lines and a
Go fishin’ or whatever
Take your lies and whatever
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lyric 05: COTTON CANDY
42006072633 - ©2006 WLL
You say you don’t know how to talk
Betcha you can’t even walk
Get over here and let me see
You smell like goo
Tied up and chained
Screaming my name in the night
Run your nails across my back
Etching sayings in my crack
Cotton candy to my eyes
Cotton candy in disguise
Cotton candy I digress
Tie me down and let me serve
You’re so bad with all your whips
I hate all your evil toys
Your face is lit up by the moon
It looks all blue
Tied up and chained
Screaming your name in the night
Run my nails across your back
Etching sayings in your crack
Cotton candy to my eyes
Cotton candy in disguise
Cotton candy you digress
Untie me now it’s me you serve
Still I’m chained and hating you
You snicker laugh throw out the key
Watch in horror as you leave
Untie me now it’s me you serve
It’s you I serve
I cannot serve
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lyric 06: BLACK HOLE
42006072634 - ©2006 WLL
Leave me now
Turn away
You’re a fright
To behold in the night
Dowse your head
Admit defeat
On the tip of my cleat
You should know you’re no looker
You couldn’t be a hooker
Stand on the corner of the road
Smack you like the bitch you are
Howling at the moon and stars
Don’t you know my mind was churning
Leave me now
It permeates
Your disease
See a doctor and leave
Toss me now before you can’t
Black holes never let go
Don’t want to absorb you
You don’t know what I can do
Thirteen is my favourite number and you’re unlucky
Hold me in your arms, no
Turning metal into jello
Just make sure you never stir it
The plot thickens
Oh take me please and let me see
Don’t you see what you’re doing to me
You see I’m thirteen
You refill my canteen
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
HOLDING BELLS
42006080451 - ©2006 WLL
Sitting here with Bell
Surrounded by the love
Of a million fuzzy things
Life can be so swell
I sip on my iced tea
Reminisce about the day
When we met and I
Know this is where I'll be
No one can take my heart
Away from me again
It isn't mine to give
It's only been my friend
Oh I can be so happy
Even when I'm sad
I like to play with Snappy
Even when he's bad
And when I wake at night
And see you in your sleep
With Snappy on your arm
I'm glad I made the Leap
With Love surrounding me
Holding onto Bell
Never let this go
Oh life can be too swell
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
DISGRACE
42006080452 ©2006 WLL
Never figured out
What I should have said
Anger held it back
Sadness took its life
Woke up every morning
Wondering what to do
Wondering where I'd go
If I should even live
Things work out at once
Not always in the end
Facing this beginning
With moonlight on my face
Stars went in one night
My own light radiates
Won't drag myself again
Through the puddles of disgrace
Never figured out
What I should have done
Ego held it back
Survival took its life
Will you be there now
Or will you walk away
Wouldn't blame you, no
I wouldn't blame you, no
Things work out at once
Not always in the end
Facing this beginning
With moonlight on my face
Stars went in one night
My own light radiates
Won't drag myself again
Through the puddles of disgrace
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
DISGRACIAL
42006080453 - ©2006 WLL
Shades of grey
Angst bestowed
Flee your country
Hate abounds, it grew
Discoloured concepts
Democracy's death
Patriotic malcontent
March us to our doom
Sons in disgrace
Mighty with their quills
Racial discontinuity
Bragging rights ensue
Cowards like the KKK
Sheets of parchment hide the lies
Write some more amendments
The ink won't ever dry
Wipe away the writing block
Burn it in the fire
No one had the heart to stop it
Even if they knew the lie
Sons in disgrace
Mighty with their quills
Racial discontinuity
How many have to die
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
IN YOUR EYES
42006081851 - ©2006 WLL
I've never been the elegant
And lovely lady momma wanted
But when I'm with you
I'm a lady in your eyes
Cute and smart they've called me
And all my life I have been haunted
But when I'm with you
I'm a lady in your eyes
Oh you don't know just what I see
when I look into your eyes
The innocence, the sparkling tears
I'm a lady in your eyes
When you sleep I see you dreaming
At times a smile on your lips
No, I'm wearing no disguise
I'm a lady in your eyes
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
UNITED
42006082111 - ©2006 WLL
The haze had lifted from the hills
We turned to see the distant mills
Our feet kept running, running fast
Eager for our future past
Chains that bound us pried apart
From murky dismal jaded hearts
Overhead the sun has risen
Forge ahead, our holy schism
Whenever will we be united
Without the pounding in our heads?
Whenever will we be united
Without the screaming in our beds?
The grassy knoll just up ahead
Is where we think we're being led
Our feet keep running, running fast
Eager for our future past
The chains that bound us broke away
Stronger chains are here to stay
Overhead the sun has risen
Plunder on, our holy schism
Has been united once again
Has been united once again
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
KASHMIR
42006092511 - ©2006 WLL
power power how I love the power
the power of music
kashmir softness of the Bond
heavy strings are in the air
I heed the call
follow me, I follow them
walking cellos made of glass
impose their beauty on the sky
violins so delicate
fleeting in and out of highs
electric impulse woven in
hearts are beating as I grin
hold it, hold it, bridge again
I love you like I did then
Kashmir ends another reign
I think I'll play it all again
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
INFLUENCE
42006092951 - ©2006 WLL
Your bad mood lingers
As I begin to understand
I place you high above me
When you're human like I am
I'm thrown off balance, not lost
As you try not to condescend
We're not perfect, yet at times
The home is hard to comprehend
If only I could help, I would
But your battles are your own
I love you for the struggles
I love the ways you've grown
I love the way your face lights up
When I walk in the room
I love the way you're so concerned
When I fall and ponder doom
And when you're sad like this at times
I don't know what to do
Twinside rivers flow with tears
And all I know is I love you
I fight against the blame I place
Upon the shoulders I lay bare
As you do; I'm not as strong
Sometimes as much as I appear
As much as I have learned I know
As wise as I may have become
I cannot fix so many things
Yet won't pretend that I am numb
Your eyes tell me when things are bad
You don't have to tell me why
You don't even know your demons
Any more than I know mine
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
CANVAS
42006100541 ©2006 WLL
A splash of colour
Lit up by the morning sky
Painted on a canvas, blue
There's not an artist
Quite like You
I drove for miles
Never stopped when mourning, I
Painted words of different hues
One of so many
With the blues
It takes a courage
To learn new things like loving. I
Poured my heart out with my truth
This was the challenge
Of my youth
Now here before me
Melodies arise, and I
Know my love is overdue
It spills out, splashing
Lit by You
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
THIS TIME OF YEAR
2006121221 - ©2006 WLL
This time of year, the morning's gray
Yet sunshine fills up every corner
The past few years have seen a change
The girl is gone and I don't mourn her
Remember when we met each other
I was me and you were you
Now you're still you and I'm still me
But we are both are a couple, too
In an instant, clarity
It's you I want forevermore
To be there in the setting sun
To see you rise up in the morning
Waking up without a sound
Even though I always hear
The way you tiptoe all around
The alarm goes off though it's still dark
You get dressed to go to work
Silent creeping, creaky door
Beneath the covers I still lurk
Just last night we fell asleep
We snuggled up so perfectly
Now we start another day
But all day long it's you I see
In an instant, clarity
It's you I want forevermore
To be there in the setting sun
To see you rise up in the morning
Waking up without a sound
Even though I always hear
The way you tiptoe all around
I feel you with me every minute
Every second, every day
Whether working or at play
Nothing steals my joy away
And tonight we'll fall asleep
We'll snuggle up so perfectly
Yeah, tonight, we'll fall asleep
We'll snuggle up so perfectly
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
My life became a blur in 2006. I continued dating and living with Dale, the guy I’d met through Yahoo! personals. My attitude and perception of work continued to improve greatly. I was half-dragged into new projects that I became OK with doing, and worked hard on, while continuing to not truly care whether it worked out there or not.
I ran into a former heartbreak and felt a rekindling of anger, but it didn’t last within the happiness I’d stumbled into and accepted. Dale was as close to perfect as I could ever ask for, and I knew I’d say yes if he asked me to marry him.
He did just that in October, and further excitement awaited me in the form of an iMac. I finally understood two things. First, Macs are far geekier than the fuzz in my navel, no matter what pc dweebs think. Second, there is such a thing as true love.
2006 rocked.